Sunday marked 1 month of EPing. 1 month of being hooked up to a machine for 4 hours a day. 1 month of being milked like a cow (moooooo). What has happened in that month?
Well, I have slowly gone from getting 15 oz per day to 20 oz per day. I have tried just about every herb out there that is supposed to increase supply. I just ordered a whole bunch online (it was on sale) and I"m hoping this combination will help even more. I pray to God every day to make me a "super producer"- these are women who produce 50+ oz per day. Oh could you imagine? If I did that, I could build up a nice freezer stash and then quit pumping before Lucy was a year old and she'd still have breastmilk until her first birthday! But I digress....
And while pumping has advantages, there are definitely disadvantages. Like how Lucy sleeps through the night now. But that doesn't mean I get to. I still get up at 11:30, 2:30, and 5:30 (which is now when I'm up for the day) to pump. It is pretty essential to keep up with my night pumps since that's when my prolactin levels are the highest. Not gonna lie- it is torture dragging my butt out of bed but it's necessary.
I've been back at work for 2 days now. I pump 5 times at work. I know- that is a lot. But it's necessary so I don't go too long between pump sessions. So I pump when I get to school, mid morning (the library comes and takes my class for me), at lunch, on my plan time, and after school. It's not too bad except I can only do work that requires limited mobility around the room. So I grade papers, check email, etc.
I also have been lugging the hospital pump back and forth. Yeah that's a pain too but my pump just isn't as good. I simply cannot do anything that would be detrimental to my supply at this point.
I have found a wonderful group on babycenter.com for moms who exclusively pump. The ladies on there are wonderful. I actually spend a lot of time on there while I'm pumping (but only at home- too much to do at school).
Have I wanted to give up already? Oh yeah definitely. It's totally disheartening to work so hard for not even enough to feed Lucy with but I keep going because I know it's what's best for her. Plus, I feel like I've sunk so much time and money into this already, it would be a waste to give up now.
So 1 month down, 10 to go (I know that's only 11 months but Lucy was already almost a month old when I started EPing). I can do it!!!
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You're doing such an awesome thing! I am so impressed with all the effort you're putting into this. Go mama!
ReplyDeleteI would absolutely hate what you are doing! I nursed all 12 of my babies, but I had to pump for a while when they told me my Baby Doll (born a month early) needed more nutrition than she could get from my milk and I had to supplement. I just sat there and bawled and felt like a terrible failure. Does it get better after you have done it for a while?
ReplyDeleteSandy
www.twelvemakesadozen.blogspot.com
Sandy- I don't know if it gets better or I'm just used to it. I absolutely have days where I want to quit but I push myself to keep going. I will say that pumping hands free has definitely helped!
ReplyDeleteAnd you're not a failure for having to supplement! I know it's hard not to feel that way (trust me I felt that way for a loooong time) but we can't help what our bodies do or don't do. We just have to accept how God made us and move on. =)
Joanna, you are my HERO! You are seriously amazing, and I am beyond impressed. You are one amazing mama! :)
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